A Leap of Faith

My view all week

Well my dears, sorry for the late post, but I was on the beautiful shores of Flathead Lake, Montana.  For those of you who haven't been that far west, I highly suggest it.  One of the most amazing parts of Montana are the colors. I've never seen so many shades of blue in the sky, the mountains, the lakes - especially Flathead Lake.  The other incredible natural aspect of Flathead was the weather.  Although the lake is in the northern part of Montana, it was a gorgeous humidity-free 90 degrees all week (aside from a 20 minute hail storm).  While I could go on endlessly about the beauty of the weather and landscape, I'll use a few pictures to do that and move on to what I did whilst in the "Big Sky Country".

A view of the lake and mountains

Where can I even begin to describe my experience in Montana?  I guess my time there can be highlighted with a series of "firsts." First off, it was one of the first times I heard my writing read back to by someone else.  I anxiously sat through Daniel's sister reading Opposites Attract out loud, a post that thoroughly describes the beginning of my relationship with her brother.  As I'm sure you can imagine, I was intensely aware that my audience now included all the women in Daniel's family.

My other "firsts" were more along actions than emotions.  It was the first time I paddle boarded, which naturally required several spills into the chilly lake. Those of you who know me personally would be proud to learn that my klutzy self was actually able to not only balance on the board but was also able to paddle out into the lake and back.  Another first included tasting huckleberry (in the form of a milkshake of course).  The most exciting first though was when we went white water rafting and jumped off a bridge.

A view of the lake and mountains

Believe me.  I'm not usually the type of person to jump off a bridge, so let me explain how this happened.  After purchasing a beautiful photo of Avalanche Lake from photographer Jim Pena at an art fair, we found a ranger outpost near Glacier National Park.  We quickly found out that there was an open white water rafting trip in half an hour.  We eagerly signed up for it and went to Apgar Campground to eat lunch. After driving around the busy shores for a while, we finally discovered an unoccupied and beautiful view for the backdrop for our dining.

Finally, we went back to the rangers and got ready to go white water rafting, something that's been on my bucket list for quite a while.  We started out on calm water, so we soaked in the view and the moment with each other.  Eventually, we reached higher level rapids and quickly got drenched in ice cold water.  Although I was cold and wet, my blood pumped with adrenaline, and I could not stop smiling.  When the raft dipped down and the waves crashed in, I screamed in fear of falling into the chilly water, yet I'd also be laughing in glee.   It was as much fun as I had hoped it would be. Overall, it was a thrilling experience, and I can't wait to go again!

The forest on the mountains

While we were rafting, we passed underneath a 35-foot tall bridge that had been standing since before the flood of 1963.  There were several people walking across it, so we slowed down and watched.  We quickly realized that there were people standing on the other side of the railing as if they were going to jump.  When we asked our guide about this, he said that people jumped off the bridge fairly frequently.  As we paddled away, I was captivated by the idea of jumping off that bridge.  The guide offered to give us directions to the bridge and explain where to jump if we were interested.  Everyone in our group turned to me to see if it was something I wanted to do.  Instantly, I expressed my interest.  Daniel asked if I was sure, and I said of course. So, it had been decided. The rest of the ride, I got asked over and over if I was sure. Again and again, I said yes, sealing my fate.

We soon finished white water rafting and drove to the bridge. I walked quickly, already feeling adrenaline pulsing through my body.  I could feel my fingers and toes trembling with anticipation. We got to the railing, and Daniel insisted on going before me.  As I watched him approach the railing, my fears raced through my mind just as I knew they were racing through his.  I think one of the scariest parts of jumping off the bridge was getting over that railing.  It was just long enough that my toes didn't quite reach the other side.  It was a

The Backdrop during Lunch

little rusty, so I didn't want to grip it too tight and cut my hand.  The worst part though was the six inch cement ledge that jutted out from below the railing, so if I slipped, I wouldn't hit the water, I would hit the cement.  So when Daniel said he was going first, my heart raced, imagining the worst case scenario.  After some encouragement and seeing a guy do a triple back flip off the top of the railing, Daniel finally jumped.

As soon as I saw his head pop up, I quickly swung my leg over and eased my other leg over.  My hands shook as I turned around and faced the water. It was so clear that I could see exactly where I SHOULDN'T land.  Every rock and pebble was visible in the shallower water.  A single pit of dark blue water rested where Daniel had just landed, just below my feet. I called out to Daniel's sister, asking if she was filming.  When she assured me she was, I took a deep breath and jumped off the bridge and out into the water.  I had my eyes closed the whole time.  I'm not sure if that was a good idea or not because about three quarters of the way down, I was sure I was going to die.  I no longer felt the sensation of falling.  Rather, I felt the complete loss of control and anxious waiting to crash into the freezing water.

Me in front of the park sign

I eventually did hit the water, and swam out of the cove. Daniel's sister climbed up the road and jumped after that, and we all drove back to the lake house.  As we rode, I mulled over the jump.  A grin stuck to my face as I remembered the exhilaration of standing on that ledge, knowing what could happen and what I hoped would happen.  Even though there was more likelihood of the jump going right than wrong, we still stand on that ledge, looking out at the beautiful deep blue water and only see the rocks protruding into both sides of the safe pit of water.  We only see the cement assuring a painful fall if we make a mistake.  We only feel the rust scraping beneath our trembling fingers.  We only hear the taunts of the onlookers who call us cowards for not jumping immediately.  When we're on that ledge, with the single goal of jumping, we often focus on the things that could prevent us from our goal instead of how to attain it.  Sometimes, like this bridge, it's not about the things that could go wrong.  Rather, we must simply take a deep breath and a leap of faith.

(The video of me jumping will be uploaded as soon as I can figure out how to do it).